Test of Fire

Thanks to Alan and Luanne for investing in our couples… I am more and more convinced of the critical need for whole and intact families – especially for our generation. We are experiencing the fall-out from the lack of whole families as we speak. Read this interesting article in TIME.

A short story from Alan about being a man for our wives and families… timely exhorting and very Alan-esque!

THE TEST OF FIRE

We were sitting around the other day with our adult children when the subject of future spouses came up. I mentioned how I would find the right man for my daughter. As the family braced themselves for another Gospel According to Al, I proceeded.

First, in the middle of nowhere, I would build a campfire. All men are attracted to fire, you know. Then I would find a place away from the fire to observe who it will attract.

  • Man #1 comes up to the fire, sits down and begins to warm himself and stay hunkered down. Not good…
  • Man #2 comes up to the fire, sits down for a bit. Then he gets up, goes out to gather more wood and come back to tend the fire. Better…
  • Man #3 comes up to the fire, sits down for a bit. Then he gets up, goes out into the wilderness. When he returns, he has one arm full of wood and the other arm full of meat…

That’s My Man!

My observations?

Man #1 is worthless. He comes into a nice situation, does nothing but fill his needs. He will either move on to another location when the fire dies or just freezes in the dark and die. I call him a sluggard to nth degree or worthless pile of pud.

Man #2 is better. He observes and takes the initiative to maintain the fire. He goes out to gather more fuel and tend to the fire making sure it does not get too big or too small. This one has potential.

Man #3 is a lot like Man #2, he observes the situation, assesses the needs of the future and goes out to fulfill those needs. He recognizes that there is more to life than just the fire and brings things in to maintain not only the fire but also the body. A Keeper!

Men, this is how our marriage relationships are. Your marriage/relationship could be like Man #1 – you just ease back after the wedding, not do anything and just let things happen around you without you doing anything about it. Your marriage/relationship will be like the fire and eventually it will burn out. You’ll either move on or just die.

Or like Man #2 – you work at your marriage and when things come up, you go fix it. Always steady, making sure things do not get out of hand where you cannot handle it. And if told to do something, it gets done.

But, Man #3 – not only do you work on your marriage, but you strive to make it better. You want to do more than just maintain. You want to begin building on it, feeding it, giving it strength and growth. You look far enough ahead to know what it takes to maintain the marriage/relationship now and in the future. You put forth the effort without having someone to tell you all the time. You share what God has given you into the marriage/relationship.

Want to keep that fire burning?
Want to keep that marriage hot?
BRING ON THE MEAT!!!!!

Learning_Community:Couples

Let’s face it – we all need some help…

We say stuff we don’t want to. We do things we wish we didn’t. We forget to put down the toilet seat and lo and behold your lady drops in in the middle of night. That’s no good.

To stem the tide of what we call the “midnight splash” and to just learn to have healthier marriages/relationships, Alan and Luanne will be hosting their quarterly Learning_Community:Couples for all marrieds and engaged ppls. Be there…

9am – THIS Sunday – June 14th
3059 Silver Estates, San Jose
MAP

AND yes… the HOM signature brunch is in full effect… bring your appetites, notebooks and a willing heart to listen and tackle the hard questions. We will definitely have childcare… but ONLY if you let Alan know ASAP [alhom[at]sbcglobal.net]. Definitely invite friends… the Hom’s are at their best when cooking for the masses!